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Why you have low self esteem.

Quote of the day:

Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.”August Wilson

    Let’s start with some topnotch definitions, according to http://www.goodchoicesgoodlife.org/choices-for-young-people/boosting-self-esteem/ : Self-esteem is simply how you feel about yourself and how you judge your worth. This evaluation has a profound impact on the choices you make since it determines, to a great extent, what you consider yourself capable and worthy of doing. While,according to psychalive.org: “low self esteem is characterized by a lack of confidence and feeling bad about oneself”. 

Low self esteem is a problem we have all grappled with at one point or the other in our life, or are still grappling with presently. Low self esteem is a thing of the mind, it’s a battle between our subconscious . It’s a feeling of not been good enough, not been fine enough, not been handsome enough or not been rich enough as opposed to the ideal mindset we have set.


Low self-esteem causes us to think of ourselves as failures in every aspect of the word. It makes us doubt ourselves and our decisions. It causes us to see only the ugly in ourselves, it makes us hear only the 1 hurtful thing said about us while forgetting the 99 other complements. It makes us take ourselves as well as life more seriously than it ought to be taken.It makes us cast aspersions on our loved ones and friends because we feel like we don’t deserve the love shown to us.

Low self esteem makes us feel like we are been done a favour by having people around  us who seem to care. We feel like just a burden to loved ones after all they deserve a better brother, aunt, nephew, niece, father ,mother ,sister , uncle ,friend ,boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse. We feel the need to hide in the shadows and watch others live the life we wish we had. We feel better hiding behind a crowd than standing at the forefront. We would look into the mirror all day detecting our faults and shortcomings. We remind ourselves everyday that we’re not worth anything but rather just a waste of space. 


We feel the need to live and play by other people’s rules and standards rather than setting ours and sticking to it. We feel the need to obey and listen to every word from another person’s mouth just because we want to keep him or her in our life. We feel the need to hide our scars with long sleeves, hoodies and long pants even during the hot sunny days. We feel the need to tuck that extra flesh into some large overflowing clothing. We feel the need to throw up after every extra meal just so we don’t feel fat or get fat. We feel the need to never wear clothing’s that appeals to us because we’re scared of been labelled as fat or anorexic or just plain ugly.

  We feel the need to pop pills just to get away from this sorrow called life, we drink ourselves to stupor just to forget about our problems. We overdose just to end the pain and bitterness locked up inside us. We contemplate suicide because “no one loves us”. We string along like a puppet all in the name of been in a relationship with someone who doesn’t value you nor your peace just because we feel that ” we might never get someone to manage us as the burden that we’re “. We dance to the tune of other just because of the fear of losing them.

  Now is the time to dance to your own tune, now is the time to lift your head up high and take a breath of fresh air because you’re about to be a changed person. Now,this road won’t be easy, there’ll be people trying to bring you down ,repeating those same old boring lines ” you’ll not be good enough” . But do you know what you’re going to do? You’re going to scream this loud and clear to that subconscious voice or to that person ” that you’re not good but rather you’re the best form of you that’ll and can ever be. Scream it loud and clear until you believe it ,” that you’re not a failure because your success isn’t defined by others”.

It’s time to take control of your emotions and your mind. It’s time for you to get your heart and brain into a synchronized order. It’s time to stand up for who you’re, it’s time to protect your peace and wellbeing, it’s time to guide that unscrupulous element constantly lowering your self esteem right out of the door of your life and throw the key away to the deepest oceans. Look at yourself in the mirror and for each flaw you think you’ve found you’ll see 10 more points of attraction.

   For each relationship lost you’ll find the doors to friendships that you never would have thought existed. Wear that dress that has always caught your fancy, dance to that music , go on that vacation, start that hobby, bake that cake, try out for that activity, go for that course of study that has always peaked your interest because at the end of the day, all the decisions you take or are to scared to take will either make or mar you. No one will bear the brunt of this except for you -this is the real failure. Your inability to rise as the lion that you’re and take your rightful position at the forefront of the fight / race of your life will be the one thing that’ll count as UTTER FAILURE💔. 

Dust yourself up and take the first steps away from self-esteem because there’s a world out there waiting for the lion king in you to surface don’t let them down❤. I believe in you. You can do this

Say this to yourself standing in front of a mirror every single day of your life❤

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Hey and welcome to my little corner Abbey's chronicles, a blog where I share my raw and unbiased thoughts on issues on mental health, lifestyle, wellness and self care. No topic is ever off limit as long as it affects lives and relationships, it's subject to discussion. This blog strives to provide solace for everyone going through issues they might not be able to talk about on a daily. My name is Abbey, a mental health advocate and enthusiast with a love for helping people who feel alone or are facing issues relating to life and mental health issues with the aim of raising awareness as well as providing succor. This blog was started as an avenue for me to deal with my own monsters. The aim of starting this blog was to for it to serve as some sort of therapy during my darkest times of depression and though it isn't all over yet, I hope this blog serves as a form of therapy to others going through similar issues relating to life and mental health. Finally in my free time I can be seen drownein movies, food, sleep and books. I guess I am a blogger at night and an aspiring medical student at other times.

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